One thing... Remains. (The Armor of God)

   Your love never fails, never gives up.

Never runs out on me.

  While in the process of preparing to move to Haiti, I was met with a lot of spiritual warfare. I wrote a blog called "Jesus take the wheel", which went into some of the struggles and spiritual warfare I was facing. While in North Carolina, the devil knew exactly where to hit me... and that was financially. I made the decision to move to North Carolina because I knew God wanted me there. I took a significant pay cut and dropped down to only one job (which was a first). I continued to finish my BSN and pay for that. After graduating, my college didn’t file a paper correctly for tax purposes and I got a bill from the IRS (this was eventually fixed) & not to mention the over $10,000 I paid out of pocket for dental work just in the two and a half years I was in North Carolina. Along with a few other bumps along the way, the devil knew finances were the one thing that may hinder me from moving to Haiti. I kept working through each bill, loan, etc… and kept telling Satin to “get out of my life”. After receiving the job offer at GLA, God provided in each circumstance in which “I was running low” and I am continual thankful he gave me the strength and courage to trust in Him and in His promises. I think Satan also realized that God can always beat him, even when it comes to finances! The few weeks before moving I felt calm and comfortable that God would provide because I was doing what he wanted me to do and moving to Haiti to serve Him and the people of Haiti.Fast forward to now. 

     Tomorrow marks three weeks of living in Haiti. I have been healthy and feeling good maybe 5 whole days. I had bronchitis the first week, followed by stomach problems and now I have had fever/chills & Strep Throat since Thursday night. New germs, food, travel, fatigue have most likely played a part in this but seriously in needs to stop. I want to be able to give 100% to the children, staff & volunteers at GLA. In my previous blog post I asked “What do you do to combat spiritual warfare? & Does anyone know of any good verses or passages to read?” I wanted to share what I found in case you were searching yourself and hadn’t found what you were looking for. Ephesians 6:10-20 says:

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.

     This set of verses is labeled “The Armor of God”; as you face the day doing God’s work, put on the full armor of God and let God do His work in your life. I will stand my ground against Satan and be cheerful, knowing that I am working for the Lord and he is my ultimate healer and provider. He will comfort me in my sickness and help me fight each battle Satan puts in front of me; whatever that may be. As I write this I can’t help but feel selfish. I live in this beautiful country full of beautiful people who are suffering. I know my financial and physical burdens will be healed. Others live without that possibility or even the hope of that possibility. I hope that as I live this life God has given me, I exude the Armor of God and am able to share the hope, strength, courage, & possibilities that come when you have faith in Jesus Christ. I leave you with this verse; “Search for the Lord and for His strength; seek his face always” Psalm 105:4.

…to be continued…

-B


An addendum... A day later.
As I finished up this post yesterday, I really wanted to find a song to lift my spirits along with Ephesians 6:10-20; so here it is: One Thing Remains by Jesus Culture.

In death, In life, I’m confident and

covered by the power of Your great love

My debt is paid, there’s nothing that can

separate my heart from Your great love...

 

You just know.

You know those nights when you can't sleep. Maybe you drank some caffeine too late, maybe you have better things to do, or maybe you just have continual thoughts running through your brain... Whatever the reason, sleep doesn't exist. Tonight is one of those nights. Swirling thoughts, emotions, plans, etc. After over a week of traveling from between South Carolina, North Carolina, & Pennsylvania; I arrived home via a delayed plane and I've been sitting here decompressing. Continuously thinking about how wonderful the time was seeing two of my bests get married to the loves of their lives, visiting family and friends, shadowing in the NICU, and making new friends along the way. Yet, also thinking about how much needs to be done within the next four weeks.... I'm a list person and the list seems forever long is such a short time but I know God has it covered.

To most people, my choice to move to Haiti is shocking and is sometimes questioned. This past week or so has been full of questions and talking and talking and questions (you get the picture). I am happy to answer the questions though because I am so excited about the opportunity God is giving me! At the same time though, I am speechless because I am in awe and incredibly thankful that God has chosen me to lead the life I do. Life is never boring when you follow God!

A lot of people have been asking me if I am nervous to be moving to Haiti or my why I am moving to Haiti. Honestly, there are really too many words to describe how I am feeling but at the same time it is indescribable! Nervous, though isn't really a word that I use. I am nervous about the preparation over the next 4 weeks but not about the move. Why? Why move to Haiti?... The answer to this is described in a blog I posted 5 months ago, I left a part of my heart in Haiti, although many, many, many things have changed since this post. The only answer is that it's a God thing. Did you ever just know... like when you met your husband or wife, found the perfect car, chose your career, school, etc... well, that's just it. I just knew Haiti was where I would be. At the airport, as I left Port Au Prince last April, I told my team and my dear friend Ronald that I would be back before the years end. Our team at Newhope Church would not be returning until January of 2013 but I new I just had to be there. So November 11th, I will start life in Haiti at God's Littlest Angels. Seriously, as I mentioned before... Life is never boring when you follow God! So here is to the next 26 days! Praying for the Lord's guidance over the next 26 days and for all of the "list items" (dog, furniture, work, travels, money,  friend & family time, etc) to get taken care of and flow smoothly!

As I try to close my thoughts (and my eyes) for the night. I want to share a song/music video just released by Audio Adrenaline, it was taped in Jacmel, Haiti and answers the questions, Why Haiti? Why an orphanage? Why infants & children? Why love the least of these?

Kings & Queens

...to be continued...

-B

Jesus take the wheel.

A long overdue blog...

So life has been running faster and faster so it seems. I have been able to spend more time with my whole family in the last month than in the last two years! It is amazing how God knows just what you need. Just a little update on getting to Haiti... I have some serious prospects and I am praying that the organization, myself and most importantly God are all in the same agreement. I feel like we all are on the same page but there is nothing official, yet. Except one thing makes it seem more real than anything... the spiritual warfare. 

I'm going to need some advice on this one. Satan seems to be roaming around hitting me right where it hurts, trying to break me down, give up my heart for Haiti, etc. Satan knows the little things that may make you not trust in God to provide. I literally just got home to find a very unpleasant "letter" in the the mail. Which I'm praying is just a error on Drexel's part and not mine!

Have you ever dealt with this? What do you do to combat spiritual warfare? Okay, so this is also a blog to ask for prayer. I need it big time. 

My heart keeps going back to my life verse Phil 4: 6&7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus".

So again I ask what do you do to combat spiritual warfare? Does anyone know of any good verses or passages to read? 

God is telling me to Go and I will! Satan you better watch out!

...to be continued...

-B

Free

So, life after Kenya & before Haiti... One word. Three syllables. Confusing!!!! After Kenya I was a bit lost. Now, I can be a semi-introverted person but once you get to know me... I will talk your ear off! So, upon arriving back in the states, I kind of did a back slide into being by myself and protecting myself from disappointment. I don't ever really want to delve deep into life's 'disappointments' in this blog... because it is pointless. The only thing I have to say (which seems to be a trend) is that God truly has a plan and purpose for every person's life and He will do nothing to harm you. I've come to learn this at a young age... Please don't get me wrong, during life's little valley's I questioned this very point but as I crawl out of the hole of negativity I put myself in, I see God's light shining through my life. I still struggle day in and day out with the ups and downs of life and ask God questions of why... I use to feel like I was a child asking their parent why and hearing "because I said so"... but now I feel like I hear "because I love you".

Okay, so I know in the last post I said Kenya wasn't necessarily "life changing" for me but it did change my perspective on life and those who have been, will be, or currently are in my life. In my short twenty-five years, I have held a lot grudges against those who have harmed me in any way, shape, or form... They may have not even known they had done something but I still held a grudge. Their words or actions would eat me up inside... for years and years I held on to things of the past.... On our last night in Kenya, Dave, our team leader, did a debrief called "a road map" and it's wonderful (this will be a very long post or a lot of short posts for another time). As Dave spoke, I listened and one thing that still stands out was his wanting to forgive quicker. What? Forgive quicker? I have always thought long and hard about before forgiving someone, let alone forgiving them quickly. Well, essentially this is the practice of deciding beforehand that everyone around you is automatically forgiven, before they even have the chance to hurt you. Doesn't this make sense! I'm sure all of those people I had held grudges against never lost a wink of sleep over how I think they hurt me... So WHY SHOULD I?!? Please don't get me wrong I get annoyed and I don't necessarily forget things that occur... but I try not to let other people affect my life in a negative way. I'm going to continue to put a smile on my face and keep on going, knowing they are forgiven and voila... the weight is off my shoulders and I can sleep!

Back to the confusing part... I was free from the burden of being unable to forgive people and holding grudges but I think I was holding a little bit of a grudge against God and myself.... Kenya was it. That is where I would serve overseas... that's what I had always had in mind... God didn't you place the desire to go to Kenya on my heart? Why isn't there a desire to move there? Why am I so disappointed? Why am I so quiet? Why do I feel alone? Many questions swirled through my head and my heart through the next 10 months leading up to my Haiti trip. After making a commitment to going on the Haiti trip at times I even doubted I should go there because I wanted to "protect" myself from the hurt and disappoint that I felt after returning home from Kenya.

Originally, I had planned to go to both of newhope's Haiti trips. There was a trip in January and in April but an unexpected $6,000 dental bill threw my finances into a downward spiral that I had not really planned for.... Some of you know I'm crazy about paying off my debt and becoming debt free, I have excel spreadsheets and all... Well, after just completing my BSN and that pretty dentist bill I didn't even know if I could squeak out the second trip... If you hadn't guessed already, I backed out of the January trip and put my focus on working major amounts of overtime! I laugh at this now because I realize that God would have made it happen if He wanted me to go on that trip.

It's amazing to look back and realize why something had happened and where you'd be if it hadn't or the other way around. Although I've only been back from Haiti for a little over three weeks I can already see why I didn't go on that trip....

I wasn't ready to hear what God needed to tell me.

...to be continued...

-B

Here it goes!

Well I've given in to blogging.


So, here it goes... my chance to inspire. 


The Goal:

Inspiring others through my journey & keeping myself accountable. 


I know you're asking yourself... Journey? Really? Well here are some things I'm working on right now that will be the main focus of this blog.

1. Deepening my relationship with God.

2. Becoming debt free.

3. Move to Haiti potentially by the end of 2012. (Depending on God's timing of course)

I'll go into further detail eventually about all of those. 

Welcome to my journey... 

-B